Have you had one of those dreadful girlfriend break up situations? Did she leave you high and dry without a clue for what happened to your relationship? Rest assured, you're not the only one to have experienced the girlfriend break up, but knowing that doesn't help. Here's some advice on what will help.
Everyone thinks that men don't deal with their emotions, keeping everything inside or choosing to ignore. They are expected to just go on with their lives as if nothing is wrong, but this is the furthest thing from the truth. Guys hurt, too, when they experience the girlfriend break up. And women tend to cause break ups far more often than men do.
What's important for men to do is find a way to express the hurt of a girlfriend break up (without violating anyone else's space, of course). Women express themselves through writing and talking. Men can do the same, but typically, just aren't wired to do those kinds of things. When men get together, the last thing they want to do is cry about their pain to each other.
However, some men are very talented with music, and many country songs came from this kind of pain, from the hearts of men who have suffered through a girlfriend break up. Others get creative in the workshop, exercising their artisan skills to express themselves. Whatever your abilities, find a way to use them to focus on something besides the ex.
You also need to rid yourself of everything that reminds you of her. Whatever things she left with you, if you can return them, do so. Some of those things may have been gifts or mementos you just can't part with, so box them up and store them out of sight for awhile. Anything else of value can be donated to a worthy charity, like the Salvation Army or Disabled American Veterans (for those of you in the U.S.).
It's going to be extremely painful to see or speak with her, so try to avoid that for the time being. Only when you feel stronger should you even think about talking to her. You need to get past at least some of your pain from the girlfriend break up first, before you try communication. After all, you want to present a strong front to her, so she knows you can get along just fine without her.
Speaking of getting along just fine, you need to get out of the house and socialize. We do not recommend dating just yet, but spending time with your friends is important. Have some fun, find ways to smile again and soon enough, your girlfriend break up will be a thing of the past. Besides, it will get back to her that you seem to be having a fine time without her, and that's what you want her to believe.
Was there some project or hobby or activity you wanted to try, but couldn't because of the complications of being in a relationship? Perhaps you wanted to try something, but she wasn't interested, or the two of you had her agenda firmly in place. Well, now's the time to get on it! Go snowboarding or bungee jumping or whatever it was that you've always wanted to try, but couldn't. Having a new activity to focus on will do wonders for your heart after the girlfriend break up. Perhaps you might volunteer your services somewhere. Helping others is always a big boost to the self-esteem and sense of worthiness. You are a valuable human being, even if she didn't think so. It's her loss and your experience of the girlfriend break up doesn't have to end in endless heartache.